I Don't Believe

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I don't believe in class distinctions.  I do, however, believe in class... 
I don't believe in buying cats and dogs as pets. Maybe because I love me a good deal, but my free dog and my bargain kitties are the best damn pets in the whole wide world... 
I don't believe in exercising too much unless there is a pending pool party.  Some might say its because I have severe bouts of laziness- in which case I would have to agree... 
I don't believe that everything happens for a reason.  I often wonder how people can use that expression so candidly and not realize how vapid it can sound when some people are suffering for no good reason.
I don't believe I have a green thumb.  10 brown withers-and-dies thumbs have I...
I don't believe I will ever understand mathematical equations, aside from general adding and subtracting.  I have shed many a tear over algebraic formulas in college...
I don't believe most salespeople.  God blessed me with an ability to cock an eyebrow for this very reason...
I don't believe this list is yet long enough. Check back, friend.  It's amazing how much stuff I don't believe in..

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