Deuces

She sometimes says “.... in the whole wide University” which makes me smile. And I don’t correct her. Because I know she means “...in the whole wide universe”. Whether she’s talking about a dessert, a toy, a game, or her love... To my budding pastry chef I often say back: “I love you more than anything else in the whole wide University”.

My mom walked in the door at 8 a.m. I had forgotten she was coming. Coming to help me. Coming to take my daughter to summer camp.  She sat next to me on the couch making small talk about home appraisals and the lunch she had the day before my with my half-sister, Diana.  Then she asked why my eyes were bloodshot.  And I cried. And I had cried not a couple hours before as my husband left the house with our baby in arms- taking her to school and himself to work. During this re-org, sometimes I cry.  And I will receive a call from my colleague Lester and he’ll tell me everything I need to hear.  Things about trust, friendships, loyalties and opportunities. And he’ll stay on the phone with me though he has less time than anyone. And his sincerity reaches me.  And I’ll receive an email from my colleague Pam who will get me back in focus.   And I’ll receive a picture from my sister- a picture that shows her happy daughter playing soccer in a championship gam...

The way she says “green”... Well... It just might be my favorite. And she’ll say it in a row, “Gween... lello... bu....  awn’j, wred....” And my heart melts at the sounds of my 26 month old daughter as she points to things and says the color. I should probably add that she never gets it right.  Unless I ask her to point to a color and she can readily find the correct color. Mostly.  I mean.... She is a toddler. And considering my parenting skills have taken a nosedive since the latest work reorganization, I can only thank Alana’s Montessori school for turning her into the ingenue she has become. I love her. She loves to be held. Tightly.  Way more tightly than anyone else I’ve ever loved. And it gives me so much... What’s the word...? Joy?  What is greater than joy but fills you up entirely and makes you feel whole? What is the word that describes a smile from the inside? What word describes the sweet satisfaction of holding a baby so close without them squirmin...