The 4 Roberts: A Dating Story
I have a decent memory for names, which is super helpful in my job. I can quickly commit it to memory, and put the associations and puzzle pieces together.
This is why I remember my 4 Roberts.
The first Robert I dated was when I was 16- clingy Robert- the one from my days at Del Taco, remember? Clingy Robert was Hispanic with dark locks and olive skin. It was with clingy Robert that I went on my first ever bowling date. It was the first time I realized that bowling lanes were slippery, and the first time I fell on my behind while, likely, trying to look adorable on a date.
My second Robert was best known as "Sweet Robbie". Robbie was blonde, and for the life of me I can't remember where we met. Sweet Robbie and I would hang out at his grandmother's house, although, ironically I never met his grandmother. Sweet Robbie was quiet and we would spend many summer days in the pool at his grandmother's. I don't even remember how and why we stopped seeing each other, but I think of Sweet Robbie when I head up to Lake Arrowhead where his grandmother lived.
My third Robert liked to be called "Rob" and we worked together in San Diego. Rob was my "Cherub, Baby-Faced Robert" and I just bet he thought if people called him 'Rob' it would make him seem older-
but,
It didn't work- he totally looked like a Cherub, only thinner. Rob and I had nothing in common, but he loved to take a girl to dinner and quite frankly, a girl's gotta' eat. Rob was the kind of guy you wish you could make yourself like, but it just wasn't gonna' happen. I remember it was baby-faced Rob who first took me to have sushi. I remember asking him what "eda-mame" was.... not realizing it was pronounced "eda-ma-may". When I delight in a bowl of edamame, cherub Rob comes to mind.
My fourth and final Robert (assuming Robert Downey, Jr. and I don't have a steamy affair) was my favorite Robert. Robert and I had been friends, and Robert was a good kisser. Like, a really good kisser. Robert spoke slowly and thoughtfully. I felt comfortable with Robert # 4. After a short time I realized Robert deserved better, and we stopped hanging out. I don't know why... but I've never successfully been able to move someone who had been my friend, someone I'd known for years, from the friend zone.
This is why I remember my 4 Roberts.
The first Robert I dated was when I was 16- clingy Robert- the one from my days at Del Taco, remember? Clingy Robert was Hispanic with dark locks and olive skin. It was with clingy Robert that I went on my first ever bowling date. It was the first time I realized that bowling lanes were slippery, and the first time I fell on my behind while, likely, trying to look adorable on a date.
My second Robert was best known as "Sweet Robbie". Robbie was blonde, and for the life of me I can't remember where we met. Sweet Robbie and I would hang out at his grandmother's house, although, ironically I never met his grandmother. Sweet Robbie was quiet and we would spend many summer days in the pool at his grandmother's. I don't even remember how and why we stopped seeing each other, but I think of Sweet Robbie when I head up to Lake Arrowhead where his grandmother lived.
My third Robert liked to be called "Rob" and we worked together in San Diego. Rob was my "Cherub, Baby-Faced Robert" and I just bet he thought if people called him 'Rob' it would make him seem older-
but,
It didn't work- he totally looked like a Cherub, only thinner. Rob and I had nothing in common, but he loved to take a girl to dinner and quite frankly, a girl's gotta' eat. Rob was the kind of guy you wish you could make yourself like, but it just wasn't gonna' happen. I remember it was baby-faced Rob who first took me to have sushi. I remember asking him what "eda-mame" was.... not realizing it was pronounced "eda-ma-may". When I delight in a bowl of edamame, cherub Rob comes to mind.
My fourth and final Robert (assuming Robert Downey, Jr. and I don't have a steamy affair) was my favorite Robert. Robert and I had been friends, and Robert was a good kisser. Like, a really good kisser. Robert spoke slowly and thoughtfully. I felt comfortable with Robert # 4. After a short time I realized Robert deserved better, and we stopped hanging out. I don't know why... but I've never successfully been able to move someone who had been my friend, someone I'd known for years, from the friend zone. These are my 4 Roberts. I'm fairly confident there aren't more in my history. But, let's face it, I can't be that sure.
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